The critique partner who thinks every word you write is a special snowflake may not be the one for you, as they’re not helping you learn. Seek out places and people that will help you learn.
I LOVE that line! Special snowflake! I wish I'd come up with it.
I immediately sent this link to my critique partners. The response back: We all know you're not a special snowflake! Geez, Heather. It would be nice if you had a little bit of snowflake in you.
I admit, I'm a tough critiquer. I try to be respectful (I think I succeed) and honest (I'm certainly that). The thing is, I feel that if you're asking for my opinion that you want my opinion.
The sad truth is: There are very few writers who want to hear what they can fix. They think their work is perfect to start with. If you have anything constructive to say, they break down in tears like you murdered their dog.
I'm not an insensitive person. Do you realize how this makes me feel to know that I've hurt you? Like crap, that's what.
Every single time I critique for someone outside of my critique circle I agonize over what I'm going to say. They have no idea what a critique from me is going to be like, even though I give them fair warning before I start. Nine times out of ten it ends badly. And I lick my wounds and swear up and down to whoever will listen that I will NEVER, EVER critique for someone again.
And then I do.
Why would I put myself through the torture? Because every once in a while I meet someone I click with. Who can take my comments in the manner they're intended and use them to figure out how to improve their writing. And in turn, I end up with someone who's willing to be honest with me and whose opinion I value.
Finding a click is a funny thing. I wish it happened more often. It doesn't, but I'm grateful for when it works.
If you're looking for a Special Snowflake, that person is not me. Consider yourself warned.